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How do introverts network?

Next to public speaking, networking must be on the Top 5 biggest fear list.

When asked about networking, most people conjure an image of exchanging namecards at a business networking event, and not seeing the person again.  Meaningless activity.  How often have you gone home and thrown away the namecards?

Networking is done at two levels (i) With people you don’t know, but would like to know and (ii) those whom you know and want to deepen connections. I’ve recently chanced upon Michael Port’s article, which I’d like to archive in my blog.

(i) Reaching out to new contacts

Michael Port in his book “Book Yourself Solid” suggests the following:

(1) Start by creating your List of 20.

20 people that you’d like to know but do not yet know but who can help you do your work.

For example:

If you want to get booked to speak, you might include specific meeting planners.

If you want to get booked to write articles, you might include specific editors.

If you want to meet well-known bloggers or authors, you might include them.

Or, maybe, if there are specific potential referral partners that you’d like to meet, you might include them.

Put these people on your List of 20.  If you don’t have 20 people who come to mind right now, just start with three. But eventually you’ll grow it and keep it at 20. Why? Keeping your list at 20 ensures that it’s a large enough so as to keep your focus expansive, yet small enough that you’re able to focus on each person specifically.

What do you do with this list? Simple. Reach out to one person on this list each day. NOT to ask for a favor or to meet for coffee but to express appreciation for them and their work.

  • Write a blog post about them or comment on a blog post that they wrote.Retweet a few of their Tweets in one day or Tweet about them or to them.
  • Write a short (under 5 lines) email or handwritten note to them telling them why you appreciate their work.

Michael Port’s favorite quotes from Winston Churchill,”It’s a mistake to look too far ahead. Only one link in the chain of destiny can be handled at a time.” Building relationships work the same way.

So, if there is someone you’d like to get to know and they have a higher professional status then you, don’t call them up and ask to meet them for a cup of coffee. You’re probably not (yet) relevant to them unless they have some prior connection to you. Remember, “Only one link in the chain of destiny at a time.”

After you reach out to the person on the top of the list, put them on the bottom. So, the person that you reached out today goes from number one to number twenty. The person who was number twenty becomes number nineteen and the person who was number two advances to the number one spot.

Then, tomorrow, reach out to the next person at the top of that list. Do this every single business day. This way, each day you are connecting with, at least, one person on your List of 20. And, over the course of one month, you’ll have connected with every person on your List of 20.

How long should this take you? About 5 minutes a day.

Of course, if you develop a strong connection right away and your relationship starts to build quickly then you take them off your List of 20 and add them to your Network of 90.

(ii) Networking with people you want to develop deeper relationships

(2) Michael suggests to keep a Network of 90 – a specific, managable, number of relavant contacts. Again, these are people you already know (or have met) that you’d like to stay in touch with and continue to build stronger relationships. If you focus on the most relevant ninety people in your network along with the twenty people on your List of 20, then you stay below Dunbar’s number of 150 which is a theoretical cognitive limit to the number of people with whom one can maintain stable social relationships.

You don’t need to know a million people, just the right people who can put business opportunities in front of you. Your job is to earn that business.

Now you’ve got your Network of 90. And, as you might remember from the beginning of this article, I suggested that you do four things each day to build your network and get booked solid.

The first was to reach out to one person on your List of 20 each day. The second, third, and fourth daily action steps will bring you closer to the people in your Network of 90.

(3) Introduce two people in your network who do not yet know each other but might find each other relvant (personally or professionally) and appreciate the introduction.

You might have two people in your Network of 90 who are scratch golfers and they live close to each other. Golfers are always looking for a 4th but they want somebody at their own level. So you might introduce them.

If you are nervous about whether or not you should make the introduction, you might ask each one individually, “I would love to introduce you to a good friend of mine who is also a scratch golfer, would you like me to?”

Or, maybe you know two people that are in the publishing industry or two people in the real estate industry. Both would present excellent opportunities for making an introduction.

Generally, business owners and executives want to continue to move forward in their careers and, to do so, they know it’s essential for them to meet new people. As a result, 9.9 times out of 10 they are going to say “Oh, yes, please do introduce me. Thank you!”

Note: when you make the introduction, share only professional, public contact information unless it’s requested that you share private contact information instead.

(4) Share information

Next, each day, share some useful or helpful information with at least one person in your Network of 90. The easiest way to do this is by reading articles in online magazines, journals, and blogs every day, the ones that are most relevant to your network.

When you see an article that is relevant to one of the people in your network, send it to them via email and say, “Hey, Jennifer, I just read this article and I immediately thought of you. It was about ‘this’ and I know you’re very interested in ‘that’ so I thought you might find it valuable. Have you read it? What do you think?” And, now you can get into a conversation with her about the subject matter and, as a result, develop your relationship.

If you like this post, subscribe to Michael Port’s newsletter.

Nature vs Nurture: Inside an introvert’s brains in a cocktail party

How understanding my introversion helped me wake up at 6am

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Photo: Company reps doing volunteer service in Shanghai

🌿Do you have an idea for doing good?

🌿Want to network with others to do good?

🌿You lack ideas of what to do, or where to give?

🌿Want to make doing good as a career?

Here are some ideas if you do not currently work for a company that does social impact. You can start off by looking at the Social Impact Landscape provided by Asia Venture Philanthropy networks (AVPN) or attend their networking events.

Hackathon Guide

RAISE

Social Innovation Park

Hackathon

SIF

VentureForGood Youth

Central Singapore CDC – Do-Good Fund

Young Change Makers Fund

National Youth Fund

Ideas for Hackathon

Giving

CSR in the Value Chain

Social Impact investing

In my visits across larger Asian cities, Im beginning to see more companies using social impact as a way of company bonding. Research shows that when we spend time helping others, our wellness level improves too.

If you are currently enrolled in a university programme, there are resources you can enroll in.

NUS Enterprise

https://lcsi.smu.edu.sg/programmes

NTU:

https://blogs.ntu.edu.sg/forgoodsessions/calendar_event/social-entrepreneurship-101/

RMIT: https://commonpurpose.org/leadership-programmes/rmit-university-global-leadership/city-challenge-singapore/

SMU:

https://lcsi.smu.edu.sg/programmes

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Photo: an old carriage wheel in Kitahama Station, Hokkaido

Its the first weekend of 2019. The fireworks and champagne have been put away. Reality strikes. 2019. As my nephew put it, its the last year that has any teen in it.

My friend Joseph from Chinese Toastmasters club sent this greeting.

用真诚经营爱情 (love/ romance)
用执着追求事业 (career)
用善良对待朋友 (relationship)
用平淡对待磨难 (meditation/ spirituality)
用虔诚祈盼幸福 (fun/ joy)
用感恩回报人间 (social causes)

心随爱走,爱随心愿。
朋友一生幸福,永远快乐!

In every culture, the new year signifies hope, new beginnings.

Even as I meditate on this photo I took in Hokkaido, Japan of an old carriage wheel found in a displaced train station, where no one stops but is now a tourist stopover from a long drive. Horse carriage disrupted by trains disrupted by cars, disrupted by …

Time rushes on.

Disruption is the only constant.

What 3 major areas will you focus in 2019?
Financial goals
Learning and Growth goals
Friendship
New technology
New markets
Fun
Volunteer
Health/ fitness?

Can you combine any of these goals?
Join a fitness class with a friend
Walk to/ from work
Train for Machu Picchu or Camino de Santiago, Spain

I’ve finally signed up for a diploma on social media branding. My goal is to increase my writing and launch a podcast.

Q: Can”t I learn on my own?
A: I’m relying on a community to push me. We will see.

As Stephen Covey wrote in his book on 7 Habits of Successful people, put in the big rocks first.

Barriers/ Limitations
Time (Classes on Saturday)
Money (government subsidy)

What I need to do to make it happen:
Research on schools offering program (done)
Application (done)

US President Trump has made a clear statement about US not subsidising the rest of the world, and imposing tariffs on its trade partners. We also see US and UK companies increase their investments in Asia bypassing tariffs.

Without the backing of political relations, will US companies finally look at increasing local relevance rather than exporting US based designs and R&D?

Especially in the digital and security space where US companies dominate, we are seeing intra regional trade, ASEAN, India-China, China-Korea and Europe-Asia Pacific as engines of growth.

These are some areas to watch out, especially in Digital innovation and the disruptive stress it brings, we see growth in the beauty/wellness/ entertainment sector, food security, cybersecurity and the financial sector that fuels these disruption!

  • Industry 4.0

    Urban Solutions and Infrastructure
    Companies investing in Digital Innovation Lab in Singapore
    Dyson
    Amazon
    ABB
    Alibaba
    Danone
    Google
    Microsoft
    Facebook
    Syngenta
    Schneider Electric


  • Beauty/ Wellness area
    20-30% increase
    Luxury brands driven by Milinieals
    Globally, the average age of people buying Porsches is 56, according to Dong Tao, a prominent economist with Credit Suisse. In China, the average buyer is just 36. Nikkei


  • Digital entertainment

    Digital content
    Razer
    Garner
    Major brands spend 40-50% on digital marketing in China

  • Digital Finance
    Fintech


  • Asia Pacific Hub
    Cybersecurity
    Finance
    HR/ Recruitment
    Organisation Development and Learning
    Taxation

What Singapore lacks in space and scale, its assets are density, connectivity and location between East and West, hub to East Asia and South East Asia. Singapore is an excellent test bed and pilot for new technology.

Singapore has been an early supporter of the BRI. Nearly a third of China’s total outbound investments to BRI countries flows through Singapore; while Singapore’s investments in China also account for 85 per cent of total inbound investments from BRI countries. ST

  • What are some trends shaping your industry?

Southeast Asia: An Emerging Market With Booming Digital Growth
https://www.visualcapitalist.com/southeast-asia-digital-growth-potential/

Are you afraid that your job will be disrupted? Not because you have a bad attitude, its business actually. Your job may be relocated to Ireland or your Canadian boss’s friend wants to work in Asia, and she can do your job.

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Chinese painting at the National Gallery of a typical market in Singapore depicting a fruit seller with coconuts and various types of local bananas. We hardly see these fruit hawkers anymore. A life disrupted.

According to global research by coauthors Willyerd (coauthor, The 2020 Workplace) and Mistick (president, Wilson Coll.), the concern is widespread.

The megatrends shaping tomorrow’s workplace will require new skill sets. The book outlines five key strategies we need.

1. Learn on the fly.
CCL uses a 70-20-10 model, 70% of learning happens informally on the job, 20% through relationships with mentors, managers or coach and 10% from formal courses or training.

2. Have an open mindset
Constant learning is better than mastery.

3. You need options
Build a diverse network, connect to people who can help your future.

4. Be greedy about seeking out experiences

Look Sideways
I enjoy the practical stretch breaks recommended in the book esp p137, “look sideways”. 
1. Volunteer for a non profit to get different experience.
2. Ask for a short term assignment
3. Work with your employer to host a hackaton and build a software based product.
4. Express yourself. Tap into your other interests. Learn bl9gging skills by writing about food or your favourite city.
5. Extend your presentation skills as an adjunct at your local college.
6. Give a brown bag talk on a topic or ideas you yourself would like to learn more about.

5. Bounce forward
Dont bounce back, bounce forward. Celebrate your little success with friends!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own.
And you know what you know.

And YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go…”

Dr. Seuss, Oh, The Places You’ll Go!

The authors’ research was sponsored by Oxford Economics and SAP (Systems Applications Products) and includes their megatrend analysis as well.

Stretch: How to Future-Proof Yourself for Tomorrow’s Workplace

Ozawa: Self assertion is perfectly normal in Europe. Its the only way to survive. In Japan though, people think and think about things until they finally take action – or take no action at all. … I am not sure which mentality is better.

Murakami: Its true in just about any field in Japan. Maybe even in writer’s circles. People cant do anything until they’ve gauged the opinions of the other people present. They look around, they absorb the atmosphere and only then do they raise their hands and say something unobjectionable. That way there’s no progress where it matters, and the status quo is set in stone. #High Context#

Absolutely on Music, conversations with Seiji Ozawa by Haruki Murakami

Let your hook always be cast; in the pool where you least expect it, there will be fish. Ovid 17 BC.

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At Enabling Village

Nearly all the best things that came to me in life have been unexpected, unplanned by me. Carl Sandburg

‘Things turn out best for people who make the best of the way things turn out’, Art Linkletter

15% of students (postgrad or undergrad) I’ve met in universities have an idea where they are going in their career. Majority have no idea. Many feel embarrassed even, that they don’t have a passion.

How can I follow my passion, if I don’t know what it is?

I recently discovered this theory, “Planned Happenstance”, although this theory was developed in 1999 by Mitchell, Levin and Krumboltz.

Planned (having arranged the parts) + Happen (to occur by chance) + Stance (a view or attitude).

‘At the core of this theory is the fact that unpredictable social factors, chance events and environmental factors are important influences on our lives.’ John Krumboltz

Planned happenstance theory proposes that career counselors can assist clients to develop five skills to recognize, create, and use chance as career opportunities.

Happenstance opens up sources of new and non-redundant information. Our destiny can change in that one moment.

These skills are relevant for all of us.

1. Curiosity: explore new learning opportunities. Try a variety of activities, to discover what you like or dislike. A lunchtime talk ? A new sport?

This happened to one of my clients who was at a lunchtime talk at his church and sat next to a headhunter working on a project up his alley.

Or my friend AT, in her thirties, found her lifetime partner, at a friend’s wedding dinner. She nearly did not attend because of work commitments. Its not only in the movies.

2. Persistence: keep trying despite setbacks. Mistakes and failures can provide great learning experiences.

3. Flexibility: change attitudes and events. If things don’t go as planned, look for new opportunities as they crop up. Find out top 3 trends impacting your industry.

4. Optimism: believe that opportunities are within reach. Be ready for it. Pick up that skill now.

5. Risk Taking: take action, small steps even in the face of uncertain outcomes. Have lunch with a different colleague every week. Volunteer to do the next company presentation. Champion a cause at the next Townhall meeting.

In “Fail Fast, Fail Often”, the authors cite Jeff Dyer’s research that people who live in a new country for 3 months are 35% more likely to start a new business or invent a new product.

Some ideas
▪Map your luck, map areas of repetition and sameness in your life and replace with activities that bring new experience.
▪Talk to someone you don’t yet know on your course or place of work
▪Learn how to articulate your strengths and interests
▪Look for opportunities to develop new skills
▪Research a new company/ product
▪Do an internship
▪Get a LinkedIn account for networking, research and exploration
▪Keep a learning journal to help you stay motivated
▪Reward yourself, do an activity you enjoy

More ideas:

Luck Is No Accident: Making the Most of Happenstance in Your Life and Career. Krumboltz, J., & Levin, A.S. (2004) Impact Publishers.

Planned Happenstance: Constructing Unexpected Career Opportunities Kathleen E. Mitchell Al S. Levin John D. Krumboltz, JOURNAL OF COUNSELING & DEVELOPMENT, SPRING 1999, VOLUME 77

Fail Fast, Fail Often: How Losing Can Help You Win: Ryan Babineaux, John Krumboltz

Research from Centre for Creative Leadership

Sometimes we focus a lot on working behind the scenes and achieving, doing. Interestingly, the Centre for Creative Leadership lists relationships as major make or break.

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Photo credit: Himself taken on streets of Bangkok

By comparing successful managers to those who derail, CCL identified 5 specific factors that increase a leader’s odds for derailment:

⚓problems with interpersonal relationships; cold, aloof and arrogant

⚓difficulty building and leading a team; cant manage subordinates

⚓difficulty changing or adapting during a transition (conflict with upper management or unable to adapt to boss with a different style)

⚓inability to think strategically, too narrow of a functional orientation.

⚓failure to meet business objectives (eg too ambitious, betrayal of trust, and poor performance)

8 enduring success themes
1. Ambitious with a Desire to succeed
2. Establish strong collaborative relationships
3. Good track record in performance
4. Can motivate and direct subordinates
5. Intelligent
6. Willing to take risks
7. Able to adapt to the environment
8. Problem solver and entrepreneurial

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Pad Thai salad at Another Hound, Bangkok. (Love the color). Recommend this @ your staff kitchen. Simple to prepare.

Do you come back from work and say:

“Honey, guess what!!?? We had pad Thai at the office cafetaria today.”

Or would you rather say:

“Honey, guess what we did at work today?”

Humans thrive on novelty and achievement. Not just free food.

Office cafetarias exist because  of convenience for colleagues to come together and collaborate. And create.

What do you think?

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Check out the chicken wings. Do you have that in your office canteen? You do? Ok. Im filling out the job application. 😀👩🏻‍⚕️

If you still still think discovering your purpose or your ‘WHY’ is too touchy feely, listen to the podcast interview by Jacob Morgan of “The Future Organisation” with Tim Munden is the Chief Learning Officer at Unilever.

Company background
Unilever owns several brands including Dove, Ben and Jerry’s, Knorrs, Walls ice-cream. Unilever is found in over 100 countries with more than 160,000 employees.

Tim talks about putting 14,000 of Unilever employees of all levels through a workshop involving the discussion of their personal motivation WHY and linking that to their learning and development needs, bringing the whole self to work.

From the “Future Organisation” website,
Tim’s career started to have focus when someone asked him two questions:
1. What do you really love?
2. What do you want to learn about?

Tim’s advice for managers is to know how to answer– what is the purpose of our business? Keep asking why, why, why. Go on the journey with the senior leadership team.

Also, ask yourself what is the business case of the potential of all of your people. All the passion and energy. What is the price of not doing this? The well-being of employees, not just physical but mental.

Tim’s advice for employees is to make sure you challenge your own humanity, don’t check it at the door. Don’t be shy to bring yourself to work.

His main challenge at Unilever? Getting people to collaborate and share knowledge in a way that creates new learning. These sessions are part of the process to get there as well as reverse mentoring. Partnering older people with younger ones and have young ones teach the older ones.

What You Will Learn In the Episode:

● What Unilever is doing to help their people find their purpose
● Why do companies need to focus on purpose?
● What learning looks like at Unilever and how it has evolved over the last 25 years
● How to create a culture of curiosity and hunger to learn at work
Link from the episode